Friday, April 10, 2009

To All My Friends:

There is this great episode of The West Wing. Here is the premise....

It includes flashbacks outlining the history of Jed Bartlet (the President) and Mrs. Landingham (his secretary). In one of the flashbacks, Jed is a young boy attending a private school at which his father is the headmaster. Mrs. Landingham is his father's secretary. She approaches Jed with a project. The school is biased in its pay to men verses women. She brings facts and figures to Jed so he can go to his father. He argues a little with her. And Mrs. Landingham's final reply is: "If you don't confront the issue because you don't think it's true or unjust, then I respect that. But if you don't do it because you are scared, then Jed, i don't even want to know you." At the end of the episode (in current time), Jed and Mrs. Landingham have a similar conversation about Jed rerunning for his second term. She says, "If you really don't want to do it, then I respect that. But if you are not rerunning because its too hard, then Jed, I don't even want to know you."

I am blogging about a TV show because it applies greatly to my current life situation, as well as the lives of many of my friends. We seem to all reside in a common time in our lives. We are all trying to make decisions about what we want, where we want to go, how we're going to get there. I have a problem with making decisions already: what I want to wear, where I want to go to dinner, which road should I take during rush hour. However, the answers to the decisions that we are all facing right now aren't simply found on a restaurant menu; they are--at the risk of sounding clique--life changing.

I struggled for a long time between remaining at the University of Utah for graduate school or adventuring to the University of Maryland. My decision was made complicated by the opportunity of financial aid in Utah and the extreme debt I would encounter in Maryland. My friends and family are in Utah, I have no one in Maryland. I know Salt Lake City; I have connections; I know where I am going and how to get places; I know the campus and where I would live. In Maryland, I would start from the bottom and the beginning all over again. But despite all those things, I knew that Maryland would offer me the better opportunities, the better future, and the better education. So last night I gave my official notice of acceptance to the University of Maryland. If I chose to go to the University of Utah, it would not have been because I truly believed it was the right place for me to be; if I declined Maryland, it would be because it would be too hard and I was scared. We are all grown up and the answers to our decisions shouldn't be the easy choice anymore.

So to all my friends who are struggling, just like me; to all my friends who are currently mid-choice; and to all my friends who know deep down what they really want:

"If you are choosing a direction because you truly don't believe in the alternative, then I respect that. But if you are walking away from what you really want because you are scared or its too hard, then I don't even want to know you."

1 comment:

  1. I always have believed that the greatest emotion is fear. It rules our lives. Sometimes you just have to go for it and make a decision. I hope you find Maryland to be all that you expect and more!

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